The only way I know how to describe our son’s birth is “hard and holy.” I say OUR because it wasn’t just me who delivered our son, it was my faithful husband, my twin sister who drove all the way from West Virginia and stepped in as a doula, the amazing hospital staff and the Lord who gave us guidance. I pray his birth story will be a positive example of having a birth plan but also holding it with an open hand. So many times I hear of positive home births and I think they are absolutely beautiful -I dream of having one of my own someday. I wanted to share our positive hospital birth because our midwives and staff were incredible and kind. We are so grateful for their skill and expertise in our care.

Wednesday December 13 We arrived at Washington Women’s Center around 12:30pm on Wednesday December 13. We were both so excited, it felt like Christmas Day! Little did we know we were in for a long journey ahead. Once we got to our room and I changed, I took my first dose of Cytotec. This is a small pill that they put into each side of your cheeks that slowly disintegrates over time. After 4 hours with no changes I took a second dose.

Thursday December 14 The next day there was so progress so they inserted a ribbon called Cervidil to soften my cervix and induce labor. This was extremely uncomfortable! We waited all day and I continued to only dilate to 5cm. My body wasn’t responding to anything so far. That night I sent Daniel home to rest and bring back my pillow and blanket. We live only 3 minutes from the hospital so he could come back quickly and I desperately wanted my own pillow.

Friday December 15 They started Pitocin around 4am and this is when things started to get very intense. Daniel arrived very early and I was having hard contractions. I can only describe it as “other worldly.” I felt like I was somewhere else when the contracts hit. They were so hard (back labor) and hardly stopped for me to rest. They started to give me nitrous oxide for pain relief. Basically it looks like a face mask that you breathe into. Around lunchtime I was feeling so discouraged when my midwife checked me again with no progress. That is when Daniel told me my twin sister was on the way from WV and would arrive soon. It gave me the boost to keep going. At 7:30 pm my midwife tried inserting the Foley balloon to help induce labor. The first and second try she failed. I can’t describe how painful this was. The only male nurse I had the entire stay, told me he couldn’t believe I was so strong. Words have such power and his gave me the courage to try again. This time my midwife called in a doctor to try who had more strength. (my cervix was still so hard) He managed to insert it without much time at all. Jolene stayed with me for a while after so Daniel could eat dinner and take a short break. He had gotten almost no sleep for several days. That night was painful and so long-it felt like I was in another world. Contractions on Pitocin are so intense. The baby has no sign of distress so I felt like I should keep going.

Saturday December 16 I woke up feeling like I couldn’t go much longer, mentally and physically. I prayed and reached for my phone to play the song “Breath of Heaven.” I immediately felt at peace and called for Daniel who was sleeping nearby. I told him I was ready for an epidural. He called the midwife and within an hour I was feeling much more “present.” I was never SO incredibly grateful for modern medicine. That afternoon at 3pm they broke my water. At 7pm I still hadn’t dilated more than 5cm. We were so discouraged but not knowing how to proceed because the baby and I still had no sign of stress. At 11:30pm Daniel came to my bed and we prayed asking the Lord to guide us. I remember the midwife coming into our room shortly after with some questions. She told us, “it can wait, the room feels so peaceful.” Soon after I started to have a fever and we took that as our sign to move forward with a C-section. It was a blessed relief to have a plan and know we would meet our son in a few hours.

My twin sister stayed with Daniel while I was prepped for surgery because he was feeling nauseous. He had gone for days without sleep and the stress of me in so much pain was really starting to affect his strength. Our midwife walked with me to the OR and she asked me if there was anything I still wanted to happen. I asked her to make sure Daniel was there when our son was born and if we could have skin to skin right away. The OR team was amazing! They were so friendly and kind. They were ready to cut me but my midwife realized Daniel wasn’t in the room yet and asked the team to wait. They graciously waited. A few minutes later Daniel joined me and they proceeded.

Robert Throne Burdge entered this world on Sunday, December 17th at 1:23 am. Our lives were forever changed in the most incredible way. I hardly have words to describe the moment he was laid on my chest. The past 5 days melted away and suddenly the 13 years of infertility dimmed. We are so thankful the Lord gave him to us. Becoming parents has brought us so much joy it’s hard to put the feelings into mere words.

Daniel, it has been wonderful watching you become a Father. You are so kind and gentle and I hope Robert grows up and becomes like you.

Jolene, I’ll never be able to thank you enough for supporting us at the hospital. Sometimes a twin just “knows.”

Robert, I’m overjoyed to be your mother. You have soothed something deep within me and I’ll love you always.

Nurse Gigi, Thank you for your incredible care postpartum. You loved my son when I wasn’t physically able. I’ll always remember your kind words: “cold hands but warm heart.”